These last few weeks back to uni have been a rollercoaster of emotion and mental states. I’m not going to lie, I’ve been far from the calm, collected, organized Ellie I was hoping to be for my final year. The thought of this year being terminal, and that every single piece of coursework I will do will be defining of my degree and thus my entire future leaves my gut wrenching and mind slowly melting. SO much pressure, so much angst, so much mental shut downs to cope with it all. And it’s only week three, and I haven’t even had any assignments due yet. The dissertation is hanging over me like a swinging wrecking ball inside my mind, and everything else uni related is also in there cluttering up and scattered all over the place.
I’ve been ill this week as well, and so that has grinded everything to a complete hault, to my mental welfares great displeasure. Luckily, I just had a chat with my now graduated with a paying job bestie Jodie over Facebook. Boy was that needed! It was such a relief when she shared that she felt the exact same way last year and that I was not alone. Just to hear that someone else gets my struggles was so needed, and on top of that she gave me some useful tips and comforting words of wisdom. I love her so much!
So here’s to a new fresh start! I’m ready to refocus my mind and my priorities, and to utilize all the things I learnt in Australia on how to do uni calmly and structured. My eyes are on that glorious prize and I am ready to work so hard for it!
I can do this!